10. I can finally fully compensate for my, er, small, er, well, you know... 9. Before now, my weekends had a severe lack of friends in...

I KNOW. THIS IS A LOT TO DIGEST IN ONE SITTING. BUT YOU NEED TO KNOW.      YOU ARE AWARE OF YOUR OWN INFINITE DIMENSIONS. YOU ARE...

THERE ARE SIGNS, IF YOU KNOW HOW TO SEE THEM, IN TIME ITSELF. TIME SEEMS TO FOLD IN ON ITSELF MORE AND MORE FREQUENTLY THE NEARER I GET...

My name is Schneez! Very good. Wait, did you say sneeze? No, Schneez, with a shhh. Oh, ok Snotrocket, this is how this is going to work...

I'm married to an incredibly capable woman who is a constant reminder of how malfunctioned I am. Without her, very little would get done.

I am here because you have a lot to answer for! Gather the Sages! YOU DO NOT HAVE THE AUTHORITY TO- I know all about your devious plan!

Every year, I seem to have another birthday. Doesn't matter that we are only born once. For some reason, it's tradition to remind each other

Crap. How are we supposed to convince Supreme and the Sages to knock it off if we can't contact them now? How did you do it last time?...

So... you're saying the octopuses want to take over the planet? Bingo.

There was a kind of gurgling noise suddenly. Like a child blowing bubbles into their chocolate milk with a straw while humming. HEAR ME.

The ultimate list of lists!

Alright, there's a lot to catch up on, and winning the lottery isn't even the half of it. I've been getting better at "hopping"...

10. The ole tap a shoulder from behind while walking past on the opposite side to make them find no one there. 9. As you drive past...

Infinite universes are perpetually stemming from infinite universes. Like branches from a tree. Infinite branches. From infinite trees.

1. (5:40am) Nooooo!!! 2. (5:45am) Screw you, alarm! 3. (5:50am) Make it stop! 4. (5:51am) Why do I have to get up every single day? 5....

She points me to a fancy reclining chair with leg and head rests. My blood runs cold. This is the chair where happy thoughts come to die.

I'm not even entirely sure if I'm doing the right thing in telling you. He did say I shouldn't tell anyone. But... I have to.

There are times (far too many times) when I just don't have a clue. I get the look. Like I'm supposed to know something.

It took effort. It didn't want me to choose my own path. I was defying its will.

I've never told anyone this. I'm not even sure why I'm coming out in this way. But I feel I need to get it out in the open...